the goddamn weather

Here's an email from dad, which pretty much sums up the Fairman Family's feelings on hot weather. Really good thing we're not in Kansas anymore.

Herself and I went to Ocean Shores today to escape the hellish 93 degree heat here. It was 70 degrees there. It was cold with the wind blowing! I loved it.

We're putting the house on the market in the fall and plan to buy in Ocean Shores. While there today, we checked real estate prices a little bit. Looked at a mobile home built in 1965 that we figure we might be able to get into with the proceeds from our house here. The place is right next to the trash dump. Nice thing about that is we wouldn't have to spend money on the garbage service. Can just dump our trash over or through the rail fence.

Another nice thing is that nearly everyone who lives in the area where we'll buy looks to be a low-life, inbred. I like that 'cuz it'll lead to fascinating discussions when we're in line with 'em at the only grocery store within 50 miles. I look forward to debating the best way to cook hotdogs in a pan of hot lard, and why it is that ignorance truly is a disadvantage in life. I'm pretty sure I'll become buddies with a buncha folks. That's a major bonus. What I'm sayin'.

Plenty of bars and churches. Those two things pretty much cover life's philosophical needs.

I'm excited. Herself is a bit more reserved but she'll come around. I haven't told her I talked on the phone to the mayor of Ocean Shores this evening. That good person assured me that the value of the place we're lookin' to buy will skyrocket in value when the State builds an extention of I-5 right past the place we're considering. It never hurts to get inside information.